Writing About Personal Experiences

Table of contents, introduction, what does it mean to write about personal experiences, what does it involve to write about your personal experiences, structure of an essay about your personal experiences, the process of writing about personal experiences, 1. preparation:, 2. drafting:, 3. revising, editing, and final draft:, general tips for writing the perfect narrative of your personal experience, topics about personal experience narrative, sample personal experience narrative.

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How to Write About Experience: A Step-by-Step Guide

Whether you are writing a college application essay or creative nonfiction, this guide will help you how to write about experience.

There are many theories about how and why humans evolved to have an unparalleled capacity for language. One theory is that two million years ago, early humans developed language to describe their personal experiences with toolmaking to teach those skills to others. 

When you write nonfiction about your own experience, in any format, you are doing something profound. You are creating an opportunity for empathy and learning. 

Writing about your own experience may sound easy (after all, you’re the world’s foremost expert on yourself), but it isn’t always as simple as “Me name Oog. Me make knife by flaking chip from stone, see!” The personal essay writing process is full of risks and potential pitfalls. However, doing it well is within nearly anyone’s grasp if they follow a few basic steps. 

Write About Tension and Conflict

Write about growth, write about something remarkable yet relatable, listing ten ideas, organizational revision, thematic revision, stylistic revision, proofreading, the bottom line on writing about experiences, what are some good topics for a life experience essay, what are examples of personal experiences, step 1: choose a topic.

How to write about experience?

If you’re old enough to write a personal essay, you’ve lived long enough to have a wealth of experiences to write about. You may think nobody would want to read about your boring life, but you’re wrong. The key is simply choosing the right experiences to write about.

In any piece of writing—a novel, a memoir, or even a college application essay—the number one way to keep a reader’s interest is to focus on two dynamics: tension and conflict. Ideally, this will include both external conflict (you versus an obstacle in the outside world) and an internal conflict (you versus yourself, emotionally speaking).

Conflict is essential for a good essay. Nobody wants to read about the dinner party you hosted where the food turned out great, the guests all got along, and someone helped you do the dishes before they left. Instead, they want to read about the dinner party you hosted where one guest threw a glass of wine in her husband’s face before storming out. Conflict makes every story more interesting. 

Tension is different from conflict, but they are related. One form of tension is that uneasy period of waiting for the obviously inevitable conflict to occur. For example, suppose conflict is a glass of wine to the face.

In that case, tension is the wife slicing her steak viciously as she watches her husband play footsie with another woman, growing red-faced with anger, standing up to leave, realizing she has a glass of wine in her hand, throwing it, and the horrifying slow-motion sequence of red wine flying through the air on the way to her husband’s face.

Tension can take a variety of other forms. Foreshadowing can create tension. If you mention that the party ended with a glass of wine to the face, but you start by describing a party that is going smoothly, the reader’s curiosity about how the party went from A to point Z can create tension. 

The subtext is another good strategy. If you can give the reader the feeling that not all is as it appears or that they know more than the characters do, the reader will wonder if and how the characters will figure it out and what conflict will result.

There are exceptions, but in general, readers find stasis boring and growth interesting. Even in the case of our caveman Oog describing his innovative stone tool construction technique, communicating about how you learned to do something important is intrinsically interesting. That is why 99% of protagonists in fiction (James Bond excluded) experience an arc of personal growth over the course of a story. Nonfiction is no different.

Phillip Lopate, an expert on the art of creative nonfiction, calls it the “double-perspective.” He explains , “In writing memoir, the trick, it seems to me, is to establish a double-perspective, which will allow the reader to participate vicariously in the experience as it was lived (the confusions and misapprehensions of the child one was, say) while conveying the sophisticated wisdom of one’s current self.”

This does not necessarily mean that your writing should contain anything as heavy-handed as an explicit lesson or moral. Instead, your goal should be to balance clarity and subtlety. The key is to show growth rather than merely telling the reader that you grew.

One of my mother’s favorite stories is about a “rubber” chicken. In this story, she, a newlywed, prepared a wonderful dinner to impress her in-laws. As she carried out a platter topped with a golden, steaming, juicy chicken that she had roasted to perfection, she tripped on a rug.

Everyone stared as the chicken launched off the platter, bouncing across the room like a rubber ball. Concealing her panic with an upbeat tone, she said, “Oops! I’ll be right back.” She picked the chicken up from the floor, took it into the kitchen, dusted it off, put it back on the platter, and walked back into the dining room. Beaming, she announced, “Good thing I roasted a backup chicken!” 

It could have happened to anyone. Something like it (embarrassment at the moment you’re trying your hardest to impress someone) has happened to everyone. It is entirely relatable, but it is also remarkable. It is a story with tension and humor baked in (pardon the pun). The visual image of the chicken bouncing across the room is memorable. Listening to the story, I felt her triumph as she overcame her panic and devised a creative solution. 

The point is you don’t need to have worked as a war zone medic or climbed Mt. Everest to write a compelling story about your own experience. You simply need to mine your memories for moments that will surprise your readers, spark an emotional response, and engage their empathy.

Step 2: Brainstorm and Build

How to write about experience? Brainstorm and build

Coming up with the base topic that will form the backbone of your essay is the easy part. The next step is to develop the idea into a draft.

If I had in mind that I wanted to write a story about my mother, I might start by thinking about how she is a kind and caring person. She grew up on a farm, and she taught me to read …  BORING! When it comes to writing essays, the first idea is rarely the best idea. 

One great strategy for digging deeper, to find the truly interesting story, is to make a list. Force yourself to make a list of at least ten different things you could write about that fit the subject.

Even if you love the second or third idea, press on and write at least ten bullet points. You may stick with the second idea, but it’s more likely that around idea eight or nine, you’ll start running out of steam, and then BAM! You’ll remember the rubber chicken.

Even if you already have the central spine of your story, you can use this technique to flesh it out. I might try to think of the top ten lessons I learned from hearing my mother’s rubber chicken story (stay calm, think fast, lie when necessary, don’t put throw rugs in the dining room, always cook a backup chicken, etc.). Just remember that your first idea will almost always be the most boring, obvious idea. Dig through the chaff until you get to the wheat.

Mind maps are a great way to brainstorm connections that will give your essay depth. Take your central idea and write it in the center of the page, and then circle it. For example, I might write “Rubber Chicken” in the middle as my starting point.

Then draw lines radiating away from the circle, and at the end of each line, write down an idea related (even if tangentially) to the central topic. For example, my second-level ideas might include connections like “Mom teaching me how to cook,” “Vegetarianism,” “When honest people lie,” “Overcoming humiliation,” and “Disastrous first impressions.” Write as many as you can.

Circle each second-level idea, then repeat the process. Then see if you can find connections between any second and third-level ideas and draw lines connecting them.

In going through this process, I might discover that rather than writing about my mother’s rubber chicken story itself, I really want to write about terrible first date experiences (connecting the humiliation and first impressions topics). I might realize that I can use the rubber chicken story as an anecdote that contrasts how I actually handled a disastrous blind date with how I wish I’d handled it. 

These kinds of unexpected connections often result in the most innovative essays. 

One of my favorite essays that I’ve written appeared in my mind, fully formed, after I read a truly stunning essay (Leslie Jamison’s “The Empathy Exams.”). I set the book down on the couch next to me and grabbed my laptop to start writing. When I finally stood up, five thousand words later, I had a free-write that, with editing, became a pretty strong essay. 

It is rarely the case that a brain dump results in a structurally sound essay in the first draft. But even when the result is a hot mess that will never see the light of day, it is an extremely valuable exercise.

A no-thoughts-censored free-write uses the momentum of your internal, intuitive sense of narrative to help you uncover ideas that you would never have thought of simply by making lists or writing your first draft using a pre-determined structure and outline.

You might only save a sentence or two from your free-write to use in your actual essay. Still, the process of getting into a flow state, writing without constraints, simply letting your brain wander is an invaluable creative process. You might need to repeatedly free-write related themes to find the magical glue that holds your essay together. 

Step 4: Revise, Revise, Revise

This section is not simply called “Revise” because the truth is virtually no great essays about your experience result from one writing session and one revision session. Therefore, revision should be viewed not as a single editing pass but as a series of them, each targeting a specific aspect of the essay. 

It is crucial to find the proper structure for your topic. Once you do, you may need to rewrite substantial sections of your draft or write entirely new sections. Therefore, structural revision should always be the first editing pass you make to save yourself wasted time and effort (for example, time spent proofreading a section you end up cutting). 

You can go with a standard structure, like chronological order, or using a “frame story” (for example, starting with a flash-forward to the ending, then moving back in time to tell the story in a chronological format), or the classic three-act structure (set-up, rising action, and climax/resolution).

You can also try a more creative or innovative structure. The “braided essay,” in which you have several distinct threads/stories that weave together, is a great choice. 

You may need to try fitting your essay into several structures before you find the one that works best for describing your experience. Don’t be afraid to think outside of the box.

At the same time, don’t get so attached to a structural gimmick (reverse-chronological order, or present tense, or anything other than first-person, for example) that it distracts from the substance of your writing.

Once you have the general structure, consider how you’ve integrated your major themes. Do they cohere, or do they send the reader’s mind heading in too many directions? Are they too obvious, or are they too subtle? Can you find ways to represent your theme implicitly, using symbolic images?

For example, is there an anecdote you can swap out for a different one that addresses the theme more meaningfully?

If it turns out all of your content related to one theme is in the last third of your essay, consider how you can sprinkle it into the beginning. Or perhaps you’ll want to do the opposite.

Is your essay structured to build up to a huge and unexpected revelation? Maybe you want to cut out obvious hints about the revelation that slipped into the first half. 

Only after the substance of the essay feels solid should you give serious attention to your sentence quality, but that doesn’t make it any less important. If you have any doubt about the power of style to elevate an essay, read one by David Sedaris, Virginia Woolf, Hunter S. Thompson, or James Baldwin.

When you’re editing for style, one of the best strategies is reading your essay aloud. Consider how your sentence length and structure affect pacing and emphasis. 

Remember that you’re writing about your experience, so the authorial voice should sound like you . You can aim for a slightly elevated version of how you normally speak, but be careful not to elevate it too much. Many otherwise delightful essays have been ruined by overly formal diction or overuse of a thesaurus.

Revision is a great time to inject some humor. You might also do a little research and include a quotation that fits your theme or some factual information that contextualizes the personal experience you’re writing about. 

Try to replace vague, mundane details with unusual, specific information. (My mother’s roasted chicken didn’t just fall to the floor, it bounced across the room like a rubber ball, for example.) Replace the passive voice with action verbs. Find good opportunities for figurative language, but don’t overdo it. 

Only when your essay feels like it’s polished and firing on all cylinders should you bother to look for typos and formatting problems. Unfortunately, by this time, you will likely be unable to actually read your essay. Instead, your eyes will skip over it and read what you expect to see there rather than the words that are actually on the page. 

That makes it extremely important to have a friend proofread your essay rather than doing it all yourself. The good news is, your essay should be so well-written at this point, from your previous rounds of editing, that it will be a pleasure for your friend to read for you.

There are certain essays and essay collections that stick with you. Sometimes it’s because the author had a truly extraordinary experience, but more often is because in reflecting on the subject, the author showed genuine insight into their own life that sparks the reader to have a new understanding of their own life.

With deliberate use of conflict, vivid detail, and the double-perspective, you can elevate your own experience and inspire others with your writing. 

FAQs on How to Write About Experience

You can’t go wrong following the three guidelines described above (write about tension and conflict, write about growth, and write about something remarkable but relatable). However, the specific experiences you write about should be guided by the goal of the writing.

For example, if you’re writing a college application essay, make sure that you directly and specifically answer the prompt. If the application asks, “Describe a person you admire and why,” don’t forget to explain the why (not just what admirable thing the person did, but why that thing mattered to you personally). But even though the prompt doesn’t ask it, remember the overall Why? Why should they want a student like you at their university?

The same principle applies when writing about your work history and other relevant experience for a prospective employer. Perhaps above all, the university or hiring manager you’re writing for wants to see that you have the potential, under their guidance, to grow as an intellectual/professional and as a human being. So show them that you know how to grow.

Even if you’re writing an essay that is more creative, more literary, focusing on the double-perspective is often the easiest way to find an essay topic with enough meaningful substance to mine. Look for a past experience that is vivid in your memory (so that you can accurately and compellingly portray your younger self’s experience) but is also remote enough to show growth (by contrasting the at-the-time experience with a new perspective).

Trauma can be a tempting starting point for an essay, but be cautious. Unless you have sufficient distance and have done the hard work of processing and recovery, trauma can be just as challenging to read as it is to write. A good rule of thumb is that if you can’t write about your trauma without including at least a few moments of levity, you aren’t ready to write about it for others to read.

If you’re trying to write about your experiences and still struggling to come up with a subject, here are five great starting points: 1. Write about a time when you faced significant obstacles and overcame them. 2. Write about the end of a meaningful relationship, for better or worse. 3. Write about the first time you visited a place totally unlike your usual environment and what it showed you about your blind spots. 4. Write about a firmly held belief you used to have and what changed your mind. 5. Write about a habit that is important to you and how you formed it.

Home — Essay Samples — Life — Life Experiences — Personal Experience

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Personal Experience Essays

Personal experiences are the threads that weave the fabric of our lives. Writing a personal experience essay isn't just about storytelling; it's about finding meaning, connecting with others, and leaving your mark on the world. So, why should you write an essay about your personal experiences? Let's explore the importance together! 🌟

Personal Experience Essay Topics 📝

Selecting the right essay topic is key to crafting a compelling narrative. Here's how to pick one:

Personal Experience Argumentative Essay 🤨

Argumentative essays based on personal experiences require you to defend a viewpoint or argument. Here are ten intriguing topics:

  • 1. Argue for or against the idea that personal experiences are the most influential factors shaping an individual's personality.
  • 2. Defend your perspective on whether overcoming adversity through personal experiences builds stronger character.
  • 3. Debate the impact of personal experiences on shaping one's political beliefs and values.
  • 4. Argue for the significance of sharing personal experiences in order to promote empathy and understanding among diverse communities.
  • 5. Defend the idea that personal experiences play a crucial role in career development and decision-making.
  • 6. Debate the ethical implications of sharing deeply personal experiences in the era of social media and oversharing.
  • 7. Argue for the therapeutic benefits of writing about and reflecting on personal experiences.
  • 8. Defend your perspective on whether personal experiences should be a central part of school curricula.
  • 9. Debate the influence of personal experiences on an individual's approach to health and wellness.
  • 10. Argue for or against the notion that personal experiences can serve as catalysts for social change and activism.

Personal Experience Cause and Effect Essay 🤯

Cause and effect essays based on personal experiences explore the reasons behind events and their consequences. Here are ten topics to consider:

  • 1. Analyze the causes and effects of a life-changing personal experience on your academic or career choices.
  • 2. Examine how personal experiences can lead to personal growth, increased self-awareness, and improved well-being.
  • 3. Investigate the effects of travel experiences on personal perspectives and cultural understanding.
  • 4. Analyze the causes and consequences of sharing personal experiences with others, including its impact on relationships.
  • 5. Examine how personal experiences can influence one's hobbies, interests, and leisure activities.
  • 6. Investigate the impact of a significant personal experience on your family dynamics and relationships.
  • 7. Analyze the causes of personal transformation through exposure to diverse cultures and environments.
  • 8. Examine how personal experiences can shape one's attitude toward risk-taking and adventure.
  • 9. Investigate the effects of sharing personal experiences through writing, art, or storytelling on your personal well-being.
  • 10. Analyze the causes and consequences of personal experiences that challenge societal norms and expectations.

Personal Experience Opinion Essay 😌

Opinion essays based on personal experiences allow you to express your subjective viewpoints. Here are ten topics to consider:

  • 1. Share your opinion on the importance of documenting personal experiences for future generations.
  • 2. Discuss your perspective on whether personal experiences should be kept private or shared openly.
  • 3. Express your thoughts on how personal experiences have shaped your sense of identity and self-worth.
  • 4. Debate the significance of personal experiences in fostering empathy and compassion among individuals and communities.
  • 5. Share your views on the role of personal experiences in building resilience and coping with life's challenges.
  • 6. Discuss the impact of personal experiences on your approach to decision-making and problem-solving.
  • 7. Express your opinion on the therapeutic benefits of writing or talking about personal experiences.
  • 8. Debate the influence of personal experiences on your sense of purpose and life goals.
  • 9. Share your perspective on how personal experiences can inspire creativity and artistic expression.
  • 10. Discuss your favorite personal experience and the lessons or insights it has provided.

Personal Experience Informative Essay 🧐

Informative essays based on personal experiences aim to educate readers. Here are ten informative topics to explore:

  • 1. Provide an in-depth analysis of the impact of a specific personal experience on your career choices and aspirations.
  • 2. Explore the therapeutic benefits of journaling and writing about personal experiences for mental health and well-being.
  • 3. Investigate the history and significance of storytelling as a means of preserving personal experiences and cultural heritage.
  • 4. Analyze the connection between personal experiences and the development of emotional intelligence.
  • 5. Examine the influence of personal experiences on decision-making processes and risk assessment.
  • 6. Investigate the role of personal experiences in shaping cultural perceptions and worldviews.
  • 7. Provide insights into the art of crafting compelling narratives based on personal experiences.
  • 8. Analyze the impact of personal experiences on an individual's resilience and ability to adapt to change.
  • 9. Examine how personal experiences can serve as valuable life lessons and sources of wisdom.
  • 10. Investigate the therapeutic benefits of group discussions and support networks for individuals sharing similar personal experiences.

Personal Experience Essay Example 📄

Personal experience thesis statement examples 📜.

Here are five examples of strong thesis statements for your personal experience essay:

  • 1. "Through the lens of personal experiences, we uncover the profound impact that seemingly ordinary moments can have on our lives, reshaping our perspectives and guiding our journeys."
  • 2. "Personal experiences serve as powerful mirrors reflecting our growth, resilience, and capacity to navigate life's challenges, ultimately shaping the narratives of our existence."
  • 3. "The sharing of personal experiences is an act of vulnerability and courage, fostering connections, empathy, and a deeper understanding of the human condition."
  • 4. "Our personal experiences are the brushstrokes on the canvas of our identity, influencing our choices, values, and the stories we tell ourselves and others."
  • 5. "In exploring personal experiences, we embark on a journey of self-discovery, unlocking the untold stories that shape our uniqueness and enrich our shared human tapestry."

Personal Experience Essay Introduction Examples 🚀

Here are three captivating introduction paragraphs to kickstart your essay:

  • 1. "Amid the chaos of everyday life, our personal experiences are the constellations that guide us, the moments that define us. As we embark on this essay journey into the depths of our own stories, we unravel the threads of our existence, each tale a testament to the power of the personal."
  • 2. "Picture a canvas where the brushstrokes are the chapters of your life—a canvas waiting for you to paint your experiences, thoughts, and emotions. The personal experience essay is your opportunity to create a masterpiece that reflects the colors of your journey."
  • 3. "In a world of noise and distractions, our personal experiences are the melodies that resonate within us. As we venture into the heart of this essay, we uncover the symphony of our lives—a composition of highs, lows, and the beauty in between."

Personal Experience Conclusion Examples 🌟

Conclude your essay with impact using these examples:

  • 1. "As we close the chapter on this exploration of personal experiences, we are reminded that our stories are the threads that connect us all. The journey continues, and each experience, no matter how small, contributes to the tapestry of our shared humanity."
  • 2. "In the final brushstroke of our personal experience essay, we recognize that our stories are not finite; they are ever-evolving, ever-inspiring. The canvas of life awaits, ready for us to create new narratives and continue shaping our destinies."
  • 3. "As the echoes of our personal experiences linger, we stand at the intersection of past, present, and future. The essay's conclusion is but a pause in the symphony of our lives, with countless more notes to be played and stories to be written."

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Telling the Story of Yourself: 6 Steps to Writing Personal Narratives

Jennifer Xue

By Jennifer Xue

writing personal narratives

Table of Contents

Why do we write personal narratives, 6 guidelines for writing personal narrative essays, inspiring personal narratives, examples of personal narrative essays, tell your story.

First off, you might be wondering: what is a personal narrative? In short, personal narratives are stories we tell about ourselves that focus on our growth, lessons learned, and reflections on our experiences.

From stories about inspirational figures we heard as children to any essay, article, or exercise where we're asked to express opinions on a situation, thing, or individual—personal narratives are everywhere.

According to Psychology Today, personal narratives allow authors to feel and release pains, while savouring moments of strength and resilience. Such emotions provide an avenue for both authors and readers to connect while supporting healing in the process.

That all sounds great. But when it comes to putting the words down on paper, we often end up with a list of experiences and no real structure to tie them together.

In this article, we'll discuss what a personal narrative essay is further, learn the 6 steps to writing one, and look at some examples of great personal narratives.

As readers, we're fascinated by memoirs, autobiographies, and long-form personal narrative articles, as they provide a glimpse into the authors' thought processes, ideas, and feelings. But you don't have to be writing your whole life story to create a personal narrative.

You might be a student writing an admissions essay , or be trying to tell your professional story in a cover letter. Regardless of your purpose, your narrative will focus on personal growth, reflections, and lessons.

Personal narratives help us connect with other people's stories due to their easy-to-digest format and because humans are empathising creatures.

We can better understand how others feel and think when we were told stories that allow us to see the world from their perspectives. The author's "I think" and "I feel" instantaneously become ours, as the brain doesn't know whether what we read is real or imaginary.

In her best-selling book Wired for Story, Lisa Cron explains that the human brain craves tales as it's hard-wired through evolution to learn what happens next. Since the brain doesn't know whether what you are reading is actual or not, we can register the moral of the story cognitively and affectively.

In academia, a narrative essay tells a story which is experiential, anecdotal, or personal. It allows the author to creatively express their thoughts, feelings, ideas, and opinions. Its length can be anywhere from a few paragraphs to hundreds of pages.

Outside of academia, personal narratives are known as a form of journalism or non-fiction works called "narrative journalism." Even highly prestigious publications like the New York Times and Time magazine have sections dedicated to personal narratives. The New Yorke is a magazine dedicated solely to this genre.

The New York Times holds personal narrative essay contests. The winners are selected because they:

had a clear narrative arc with a conflict and a main character who changed in some way. They artfully balanced the action of the story with reflection on what it meant to the writer. They took risks, like including dialogue or playing with punctuation, sentence structure and word choice to develop a strong voice. And, perhaps most important, they focused on a specific moment or theme – a conversation, a trip to the mall, a speech tournament, a hospital visit – instead of trying to sum up the writer’s life in 600 words.

In a nutshell, a personal narrative can cover any reflective and contemplative subject with a strong voice and a unique perspective, including uncommon private values. It's written in first person and the story encompasses a specific moment in time worthy of a discussion.

Writing a personal narrative essay involves both objectivity and subjectivity. You'll need to be objective enough to recognise the importance of an event or a situation to explore and write about. On the other hand, you must be subjective enough to inject private thoughts and feelings to make your point.

With personal narratives, you are both the muse and the creator – you have control over how your story is told. However, like any other type of writing, it comes with guidelines.

1. Write Your Personal Narrative as a Story

As a story, it must include an introduction, characters, plot, setting, climax, anti-climax (if any), and conclusion. Another way to approach it is by structuring it with an introduction, body, and conclusion. The introduction should set the tone, while the body should focus on the key point(s) you want to get across. The conclusion can tell the reader what lessons you have learned from the story you've just told.

2. Give Your Personal Narrative a Clear Purpose

Your narrative essay should reflect your unique perspective on life. This is a lot harder than it sounds. You need to establish your perspective, the key things you want your reader to take away, and your tone of voice. It's a good idea to have a set purpose in mind for the narrative before you start writing.

Let's say you want to write about how you manage depression without taking any medicine. This could go in any number of ways, but isolating a purpose will help you focus your writing and choose which stories to tell. Are you advocating for a holistic approach, or do you want to describe your emotional experience for people thinking of trying it?

Having this focus will allow you to put your own unique take on what you did (and didn't do, if applicable), what changed you, and the lessons learned along the way.

3. Show, Don't Tell

It's a narration, so the narrative should show readers what happened, instead of telling them. As well as being a storyteller, the author should take part as one of the characters. Keep this in mind when writing, as the way you shape your perspective can have a big impact on how your reader sees your overarching plot. Don't slip into just explaining everything that happened because it happened to you. Show your reader with action.

dialogue tags

You can check for instances of telling rather than showing with ProWritingAid. For example, instead of:

"You never let me do anything!" I cried disdainfully.
"You never let me do anything!" To this day, my mother swears that the glare I levelled at her as I spat those words out could have soured milk.

Using ProWritingAid will help you find these instances in your manuscript and edit them without spending hours trawling through your work yourself.

4. Use "I," But Don't Overuse It

You, the author, take ownership of the story, so the first person pronoun "I" is used throughout. However, you shouldn't overuse it, as it'd make it sound too self-centred and redundant.

ProWritingAid can also help you here – the Style Report will tell you if you've started too many sentences with "I", and show you how to introduce more variation in your writing.

5. Pay Attention to Tenses

Tense is key to understanding. Personal narratives mostly tell the story of events that happened in the past, so many authors choose to use the past tense. This helps separate out your current, narrating voice and your past self who you are narrating. If you're writing in the present tense, make sure that you keep it consistent throughout.

tenses in narratives

6. Make Your Conclusion Satisfying

Satisfy your readers by giving them an unforgettable closing scene. The body of the narration should build up the plot to climax. This doesn't have to be something incredible or shocking, just something that helps give an interesting take on your story.

The takeaways or the lessons learned should be written without lecturing. Whenever possible, continue to show rather than tell. Don't say what you learned, narrate what you do differently now. This will help the moral of your story shine through without being too preachy.

GoodReads is a great starting point for selecting read-worthy personal narrative books. Here are five of my favourites.

Owl Moon by Jane Yolen

Jane Yolen, the author of 386 books, wrote this poetic story about a daughter and her father who went owling. Instead of learning about owls, Yolen invites readers to contemplate the meaning of gentleness and hope.

Night by Elie Wiesel

Elie Wiesel was a teenager when he and his family were sent to Auschwitz concentration camp in 1944. This Holocaust memoir has a strong message that such horrific events should never be repeated.

The Diary of a Young Girl by Anne Frank

This classic is a must-read by young and old alike. It's a remarkable diary by a 13-year-old Jewish girl who hid inside a secret annexe of an old building during the Nazi occupation of the Netherlands in 1942.

The Year of Magical Thinking by Joan Didion

This is a personal narrative written by a brave author renowned for her clarity, passion, and honesty. Didion shares how in December 2003, she lost her husband of 40 years to a massive heart attack and dealt with the acute illness of her only daughter. She speaks about grief, memories, illness, and hope.

Educated by Tara Westover

Author Tara Westover was raised by survivalist parents. She didn't go to school until 17 years of age, which later took her to Harvard and Cambridge. It's a story about the struggle for quest for knowledge and self-reinvention.

Narrative and personal narrative journalism are gaining more popularity these days. You can find distinguished personal narratives all over the web.

Curating the best of the best of personal narratives and narrative essays from all over the web. Some are award-winning articles.

Narratively

Long-form writing to celebrate humanity through storytelling. It publishes personal narrative essays written to provoke, inspire, and reflect, touching lesser-known and overlooked subjects.

Narrative Magazine

It publishes non,fiction narratives, poetry, and fiction. Among its contributors is Frank Conroy, the author of Stop-Time , a memoir that has never been out of print since 1967.

Thought Catalog

Aimed at Generation Z, it publishes personal narrative essays on self-improvement, family, friendship, romance, and others.

Personal narratives will continue to be popular as our brains are wired for stories. We love reading about others and telling stories of ourselves, as they bring satisfaction and a better understanding of the world around us.

Personal narratives make us better humans. Enjoy telling yours!

writing personal experience essay

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Jennifer Xue is an award-winning e-book author with 2,500+ articles and 100+ e-books/reports published under her belt. She also taught 50+ college-level essay and paper writing classes. Her byline has appeared in Forbes, Fortune, Cosmopolitan, Esquire, Business.com, Business2Community, Addicted2Success, Good Men Project, and others. Her blog is JenniferXue.com. Follow her on Twitter @jenxuewrites].

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7 Helpful Tips on How to Write A Memorable Personal Essay

Karen Hertzberg

Everyone has a story to tell and a message to share. The challenge lies in getting that story and message out of your head and into print in a way that resonates with your audience.

Starting somewhere in the late 2000s, a certain type of personal essay experienced a popularity boom. These essays were ultra-personal and confessional in nature, often in a TMI sort of way. Their headlines were clickable, not to mention shareable, for their shock value alone.

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Although the confessional shock essay’s star seems to be fading, the personal essay itself is still standing strong. Essay collections by late greats like James Baldwin ( The Fire Next Time ) and David Foster Wallace ( Consider the Lobster ) still top Amazon’s Best Sellers in essays. Jenny Lawson (aka The Bloggess) launched a career with her darkly funny and self-effacing essays about her health and mental illness challenges ( Let’s Pretend This Never Happened ). Celebrities like Mindy Kaling ( Why Not Me? ) and Tina Fey ( Bossypants ) blended personal essays into memoir-esque collections that became best sellers. We head for the nearest bookseller when essay titans like David Sedaris or Anne Lamott have a new release.

We’re looking for real stories and musings from people who are able to share their foibles, lessons, and truths in a way we can relate to. Here are seven tips to help you craft a personal essay that will connect with readers.

1 Understand what a personal essay is

Ask three different experts what a personal essay is and you’ll likely get three different answers. Are they structured? Must they address a certain type of subject? Here’s a definition we like:

A personal essay is a short work of autobiographical nonfiction characterized by a sense of intimacy and a conversational manner. Also called a personal statement. A type of creative nonfiction, the personal essay is ‘all over the map,’ according to Annie Dillard. ‘There’s nothing you can’t do with it. No subject matter is forbidden, no structure is prescribed. You get to make up your own form every time.’

Personal essays relate the author’s intimate thoughts and experiences to universal truths. They aren’t simply a retelling of events, though—that falls more in the realm of memoir or autobiography. They conclude with the author having learned, changed, or grown in some way and often present some truth or insight that challenges the reader to draw their own conclusions.

2 Find a compelling topic

The best essay topics are often deeply relatable. Although the story itself is unique to the author’s experience, there’s some universal truth that speaks to us from just below the surface. Topics like facing a fear, falling in love, overcoming an obstacle, discovering something new, or making a difficult choice tackle feelings and events that happen in everyone’s life.

3 Start with a strong hook

As with any type of writing, it’s essential to draw the reader in from the very first paragraph , or even the first sentence. Here are a few examples.

Aside from Peter, who supposedly guards the gates of heaven and is a pivotal figure in any number of jokes, the only saint who’s ever remotely interested me is Francis of Assisi, who was friends with the animals.
When I was young, my family didn’t go on outings to the circus or trips to Disneyland. We couldn’t afford them. Instead, we stayed in our small rural West Texas town, and my parents took us to cemeteries.
I underwent, during the summer that I became fourteen, a prolonged religious crisis.
Alone, we are doomed. By the same token, we’ve learned that people are impossible, even the ones we love most— especially the ones we love most.

Your hook and opening paragraph should establish the topic of your essay (or at least allude to it) and set the scene and tone.

4 Create an outline

All it takes to understand the importance of an outline is listening to someone who struggled to tell a personal story. Often, the story will seem to have no real point. The switchbacks where the teller says “But wait, I have to tell you about this part, first!” are maddening and disruptive. An outline will help you organize your thoughts before committing them to text.

Consider your opening hook and the statement it makes, then map out the sequence of events or main points that support it. Just like a good fictional story, your essay should have rising action. Raise the stakes with each paragraph until you reach a climax or turning point. Plan to add a conclusion that will evoke an emotional response in your reader.

5 Narrow your focus

Don’t try to write to a general topic. Your essay may well be about sexism, but you need to illustrate it through the lens of a defining incident that’s deeply personal to you. What did your experiences teach you about sexism? What does it mean to you as an individual?

6 Show, don’t tell

Close your eyes. Think of the scene you’re about to write down. What were you experiencing with your five senses? How did you feel?

Your challenge is to evoke those senses and feelings without flatly stating them. Don’t say “I felt cold.” Say “I exhaled and my breath turned to vapor that hung in the air. I shivered and pulled the blanket tight around my shoulders in a vain attempt to trap my body heat.” Your description should help the reader experience the cold with you. Stephen King describes it as making the reader “prickle with recognition.”

7 Craft a thought-provoking conclusion

Your essay should end with your own reflection and analysis. What did you learn? How have the events and thoughts you described changed your life or your understanding of life? It’s not enough to say “And that’s what happened.” You have to describe how whatever happened shaped you.

Just as a good lead hooks readers and draws them along for the ride, a good conclusion releases them from your essay’s thrall with a frisson of pleasure, agreement, passion or some other sense of completion. Circling back to your lead in your conclusion is one way to give readers that full-circle sense. Try to restate your thesis in a way that reflects the journey the essay has taken.
There is so much outside the false cloister of private experience; and when you write, you do the work of connecting that terrible privacy to everything beyond it.

writing personal experience essay

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COMMENTS

  1. How to Write a Personal Experience Essay With Sample Papers

    Step-by-step instructions with many examples. How to choose your topic and how to organize effectively so you can write a personal experience essay quickly.

  2. Writing About Personal Experiences With Impact (A Step-By ...

    Choose a well-written personal experience essay to understand the narrative structure, style, and how the author weaves emotions into the story. b. Selecting a Personal Experience: Choose a significant experience that has left a lasting impact or taught you valuable lessons.

  3. How To Write About Experience: A Step-by-Step Guide

    If you’re old enough to write a personal essay, you’ve lived long enough to have a wealth of experiences to write about. You may think nobody would want to read about your boring life, but you’re wrong. The key is simply choosing the right experiences to write about.

  4. Personal Experience Essay Examples - GradesFixer

    Use our step-by-step instructions to write Personal Experience essays and papers. Check out over 50 examples for your successful essay in one click.

  5. How to Write a Personal Narrative: Steps and Examples

    In academia, a narrative essay tells a story which is experiential, anecdotal, or personal. It allows the author to creatively express their thoughts, feelings, ideas, and opinions. Its length can be anywhere from a few paragraphs to hundreds of pages.

  6. 7 Helpful Tips on How to Write A Memorable Personal Essay

    Personal essays relate intimate thoughts and experiences to universal truths. Here’s how to tell your story in a way that resonates.